NASCAR officials have uncovered a nefarious attempt by one of their star drivers to use a main sponsor to obtain an unfair advantage.

Fed Ex employee Wally Carr knew something was amiss when he got a page to pick up a package at the #11 hauler of Denny Hamlin prior to Sunday’s UAW Dodge 400 at Las Vegas.

“When I get there, it was just Denny and his race car, all wrapped up in brown paper,” Carr confessed. “He had the form filled out already and stuck to the hood. Denny Hamlin. Same-Day Delivery. Number of Packages: 1. Package Weight: 3,450 lbs. Destination: Finish Line, UAW Dodge 400, Las Vegas.”

Instead of alerting Denny Hamlin that he suspected foul play, Carr nonchalantly told Hamlin he could not fit the Sprint Car on the dolly he brought and would have to return with a larger one.

“I kind of felt bad for the guy, I mean, he’s won so many events for Fed Ex — on the riding lawn mower, in the nursing home, and stuffing all of those envelopes at Kinko’s — but this felt underhanded to me.”

Carr checked with Fed Ex’s marketing team, who are always available to consult with drivers on their routes on whether or not a situation has been planned by Fed Ex brass for a TV commercial. But this was no TV commercial.

“I went back to the hauler and told Denny he’d have to pay the same-day charge up front for the delivery, thinking the price tag would scare him off. Not a chance. Denny told me if I delivered the car to the Finish line before anyone else could that he would split the race winnings with me,” Carr said. “There was nothing else to do but call Mike Helton.”

Unlike Dale Jarrett’s frequent attempts to enter a UPS truck in Cup competition, Hamlin’s hijinks are sure to draw sanction from the league.