When Punxsutawney Phil emerges from his hole each February 2^nd, he brings with him a prediction on whether we will have an early spring or six more weeks of winter.  That information all hinges on one simple thing, does he see his shadow or not when he emerges from his den.  This year, America’s most famous groundhog saw his shadow and we are faced with the prospect of a long winter.  But Phil isn’t the only rodent that has achieved national notoriety.  No, a close relative of the groundhog has risen to national prominence, thanks to Fox Sports and their NASCAR coverage.  Emerging from his hole every February is Digger, a gopher and mascot for Fox Sports “Gopher Cam.”  This rodent sensation doesn’t hold the power to predict the length of seasons, but Digger has something much more powerful under his belt.  When Digger emerges from his hole, the entire fate of NASCAR fandom rests on his shoulders.  America waits in breathless anticipation to see if Digger sees his shadow.  If so, we can expect 12 more long weeks of Darrell Waltrip and his NASCAR color commentary.

“Mike and I dread the news each and every year,” explains Mike Joy’s personal assistant Clancy Butterfinger.  “In that Florida sunshine we can just about expect that rat to see his shadow.  That damn mouse pokes his head out, gets spooked and high tails it back down his hole.  12 more weeks of Boogity.  It’s enough to drive a man insane.”

Although anticipation was high due to the overcast conditions for this year’s Daytona 500, Digger emerged from his hole to see his shadow once again. 

“Personally I can’t wait to lay eyes on that little rascal Digger,” said Dee Double Yuh’s annoying on air persona.  “It’s the best part of the race.  I ain’t seen that little fella in a coon’s age.  And he’s always full of surprises!  This year, instead of just providing up with “ground breaking” coverage, my little fuzzy buddy shows up with his very own animated series.  You never know what you’re gonna get with Digger.  He’s a real treasure.  Like me!”

Controversy erupted through the broadcast booth this year when news leaked that Mike Joy tried to hire an exterminator to ensure that Digger doesn’t see his shadow this year, a charge that Joy denies.

“I can neither confirm nor deny any contact with Mr. Joy due to exterminator/client privilege,” explained noted Daytona FL exterminator Deke Sniffingham.  “What I will confirm is that Digger is a menace.  If I can save someone from another needless boogity then I’d say I’ve done my job.  One thing I can guarantee is that NASCAR fans won’t be seeing any Digger come July.”

Sniffingham’s prediction holds little weight since Fox’s NASCAR coverage will be replaced by TNT for July’s running of the Pepsi 400 at Daytona International Speedway.  TNT does not have the rights to use Digger or the gopher cam technology.  TNT however is reportedly in discussions with Punxsutawney Phil to sign him to the broadcast team. 

“I have been lobbying to get NASCAR to move the first race of the year to Alaska,” continued Butterfinger.  “They only get a couple of hours of sunlight there during the winter so I figure the chances of Digger actually seeing his shadow decrease significantly.  Unfortunately, no one is too interested in that idea.  Personally I think the Juneau 500 has a nice ring to it.”